Just one of those times when i feel like ranting at the whole damned world
and my family ........................
What appeared to be a normal day yesterday turned out to be a day of shouting of words of hatred, a cold war, and most unfortunately, tears from my mother.
and of course my father.....who THINKS he's so good in running the family
he just never seems to be able to SHUT HIS GOD DAMNED mouth so that my mom can actually work in peace within the house to cather to our needs, (and HIS whim and fancies)
But tell me, who the hell can actually work in an environment where people keep scolding you when you did actually nothing wrong...
Most people will reach breaking point after a few days or weeks.
My mom took it in her stride for 27 years ever since the day she bonded her life to the monster that is my father.
So yesterday, my mom was just doing the dishes and my dad had to NAG...NAG at her about how much water she was using, and how she was not allowing ventilation into the kitchen by closing the window.
Of course the next level is to shout at each other...
And on occasional times (like yesterday) screaming....shouts and claims of divorce
and finally.... my mom going mad...
literally...
Bellatrix Lestrange pales in comparison to my mother when she's mad.
The usual throwing stuff, cursing my father an early death (which at this point of time i do hope) and screaming out...
What has she done to receive this sort of emotional and mental abuse of my father?
FOR 27 YEARS SHE HAS GIVEN HER ALL TO THIS FAMILY, SO DON'T SCOLD AND KEEP NAGGING AT HER... ALL THIS TIME SHE TOLERATED YOUR UNCONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISMS, INSULTS...
if it was me i would have done the time where she almost wanted to stab him...many years back.
You might say that if my dad was dead, i would not have been born.
no shit, but sometimes i rather not be born, and not face his tyranny too, and at the least my mom could face her consequences, and get another much better man, who would at least love her faithfully.
And the worst thing is that, there is no love between them anymore.
So be it, but even mutual respect and understanding is absent in their relationship.
The ring on my mom's finger, like an emotional prison clings to her, reminding her of the time of her suffering all these years. And it would not come off with soap either, just like a curse embedded on her for life.
It was only after moments of consoling, and tears shed by me that she finally calmed herself to sleep.
And another thing was that Leonard was having lessons with my sis, and so he heard the shouting...
The cold war between them now carries on...
But you know the political strategy:
Force the enemy to battle on 2 fronts...
he had to find trouble with me too...
yesterday was on my way to school, but had dirroeah, so din go school...went to doctors and got 2 days MC.
Ms Pereira called up, (thx ma'am, but im fine now...just still having some dirroeah)
My father, being the asshole and not understanding, unfeeling bastard that he was used force on me....scolded, shouted at me...
(a side note... Doc says I have some sort of pustules in left tonsil, and I have high blood pressure. 145...normal person's reading is 130..my time is almost up i guess)
So fine, i got dressed in my uniform and went to school...
But either way, i have reached my breaking point...where sooner or later he's gonna get it from not just me, but the whole family...
with his constant overdominant attitude of the family, everyone's gonna rebel.
And seriously, your life does not really matter to me anymore. We might be poorer when you die, but i can say at least we won't have to stand for your bullshit.
Call me an ungrateful bastard if you want...but thats the way im feeling right now...i cant think straight so forgive me if i offend you (readers) in anyway.
I'm just feeling very tired and sickened of all that is going on in this family.
If there was one thing that God had to improve on my dad, it was his mouth.
And that's why God gave men only one mouth instead of 2.
yeah, and you can stop trying to pretend being a good father and wake up at the crack of dawn and make breakfast for me to eat, which you know I do so reluctantly under your threats and nagging,
COZ I DON"T FUCKING NEED IT.
You call me an undeserving prefect...with all my poor results and laziness...
WELL I TELL YOU, IT TAKES A GREATER ONE TO KNOW ANOTHER.
TAKE THE LOG OUT OF YOUR OWN EYE BEFORE YOU TAKE THE SPECK OF DUST OUT OF MINE.
you were worse in your younger days, much worse than any of us...so don't expect any different either.
Anyway my time is short, so why not just do whatever I want before I go peacefully...
Life is that fragile, 15 and I feel I am already on the brink of death...or at least i choose to believe.
I'd rather live a short life full of happiness than live a long life of misery.
Either way this is it...I am not gonna stand for this anymore...
You want something done for you...
GO FUCKING DO IT YOURSELF YOU ASSHOLE!
ben this ben that, who the fuck do you think i am....
Just let us have some peace and silence
for once in your life, hold your tongue.
